Personally as a mom raising a beautiful son on the autism spectrum, I make it my responsibility to create autism awareness and ensure I am using my voice to speak about autism and it’s many spectrum. I don’t care when or where, when opportunity present itself, I grab it, for me, everyday is a perfect day to create autism awareness.
When we got diagnosed with autism, It was a very confusing time, I had no idea what it was or what to expect, suddenly all the plans and goals we had for our son was being threatened by a diagnosis we know absolutely nothing about nor knowledge on how to approach or navigate through it. I had no family member who had gone through autism or anyone to guide or keep me informed.
One thing I was very sure of was that my son was perfect, he is a prayer answered. I have longed and dreamt of days i feel the warmth, love and embrace of a child, and now that I have that, not even autism can take that away from me. Never
Autism and I will just have to become friends. Of course it’s human nature to hurt, grieve and be angry, but the approach we take when life throws us a curve ball, determines and plays a significant role in our abilities to overcome those challenges. autism or not, we are in this journey together, i had this hunger, drive and energy to get myself educated and informed about autism, I had no time to ask why, but rather continue to think of ways we can get my baby boy the necessary support and resources required to kick autism in the bud. I was told autism had no cure and that it was a life long condition, well who spoke of a cure, my son isn’t sick, he has autism, he is uniquely different, he accomplishes and get things done differently, what’s wrong with that?
My only fear or concern was how the world label or treat my child because of his autism abilities. let’s not pretend this world isn’t messed up to begin with, people can be unbelievable mean, with so many false narrative and misconceptions surrounding autistic people, which parents won’t be concerned. Well we all are
I know you will wonder, how has his diagnosis made your lives better, well it did
Now when we make decisions as parents, we think of how our decisions not only impact our son, but is able to positively impact the autism community/society as a whole. Life is more beautiful when we win and excel together. Together as a community, we are much stronger.
I have learned to stress less and only worry about the things that matter most. I prioritize quality time over quantity. It’s not about the amounts of time you’ve spent with your kids, but the quality of time you’ve spent creating and making lasting memories. I realize time moves fast, they won’t be kids forever, so why stress about the messes they make or the amount of stains they put on the couch. Let’s have fun cleaning the mess ( I know someday I will miss those days)
Lastly I try to be kind to myself, I am intuitive with my choices and decisions, I avoid making comparisons on achievements and goals, I focus on what my child is able and continues to achieve over time, I try and ensure I avoid putting pressure on him in times of task, responsibilities or obligations. We have our unique and individual milestones.
I seek professional guidance and opinions from experts or sometimes parents with Similar experiences, but I can assure you I make my own decisions and conclusions when it comes to my child. Let’s not forget, autism is a condition, but not all autistic people are alike. I am constantly on trials and error. I am unapologetic when it comes to ensuring my son’s needs are met and comes first.
How do I handle bullies or people who might be unkind to my child? The world is an unfair place, as much as we constantly preach and talk about kindness, we can’t change everybody. Some people are and will always be mean. What we can do is to teach our kids to recognize toxicity, empower them on how to approach, identify and manage toxic behaviours and situations.
Parenting is a tricky thing, it’s a journey you only figure out on a personal level, raising children on the autism spectrum its even more trickier. You have to become more creative and patient at every level. Become the voice of your child, imagine living in a world where everything is black and white, boring right? Well our kids are the color the world needed, Dont let anyone tell you otherwise. At the end your sacrifices will be all worth it. Don’t give up mama, you are doing good, and we are rooting for you.
Wonderfully Autistic 